As the Year Goes..!!

As the year walk

Towards the fire of ending

With a cheer rather than

A quiver of sorrow

I look at it with that

Great admiration

Wow. How brave it is

Courageously moving to immolation

Without a turning back

Coating regrets or despairs  

But content as a soul seeks

The eternal release

Even in me, a sorrow took birth

For I lost a leaf from

The tree of my life

My inner self yearn for

A protective shell so that

Death never finds me

To take its turn on me

 The year gave me so much

Mixed up in a crystal bowl

A few sadness and grief

And a handful of

Love care and memories

I still would take

A dozen of guilt that

I wish to set free in the

Coming year as petals of roses in the air

That fly high like uncaged after an infinity

Before this year get over

I desire to share

Love to the unloved

Care to the uncared

Support to the unwanted and

Redemption to the sufferers

May the coming year be

The best times in everyone’s lives

To convey happiness and equality

For the souls are shapeless

But they live in different shapes… 

Brief Life..

Momentary is it

The money we earn and

The extravagances

It only has the life of

A vapor that disperse

And disappears in the air

Like the fishes in the oceans

The herd of birds in the sky

Like the nesting ants underground

Sophistication must be taken

To manifest the right flow

But without being harm

To the fellows survive around

Iron is hard but a fire

Can make it flex like a wire

Or a giant of a mountain

Can be broke with the aid

Of a hand held hammer

Nothings complicated

But just to surrender the

Thrust of unthrifty

Let’s make up our minds

To work hands held tight

For the mother who bears us

Evenly as the fruit of her womb

Not discriminating over

The holes and cuts on us

Let’s be as unbiased and

Impartial as the surrogate mother

Let’s blew off the crimson of

Red petals of Love in the air

And invite unity love and respect…

The Eternal Fusion

The electric chills that chased me

From the woods to the banks of the river

Travelled through my heels and back

Reached behind the curve of my neck

To awoke a shiver

So sensual and insufferable

Still wanting it to not to stop

Passing its clumsy but powerful shocks

That fills my heart with full of you. 

Like butter I melted in to you

Making it look like a

One single perfect sculpture

A flower in the heaven fall down

And you tucked it behind my ears

Like the goddess of love wears it

So elegant and aesthetic

The single soul in me and you

Refused to part in to two

And it clings through the creepers

That grows high to the sky

Spreading its shoots that sprout

In its yellowy green tinge 

That filled my eyes moist.

The zygo grow strong

Impossibly Inseparable

Joining heart to heart

Brain to brain and

Lung to lung

The blood streams blend

And the breaths combined

Build a new personification

From the duet to the mono  

For the rest of the times

That the universe would last…

Rich Wine

Through the years

Like a rich wine

Our bond grew strong

A sniff would be enough

To infuse the spirits

That is adequately potent to

Defeat the senses 

I doubt you carry

The strength to tolerate

The massive shots of

Persuasive ecstasies 

That would explode like a

Fountain of sherry

Sweet savoury bitter and sour…

The Malevolence

Sacred in the darkness of

Howling wild foxes

I tried hard to hide

From the letching red eyes 

Those penetrate through me

Like a sharp sword of lust

I turned around

Passed lightning sharp

Frowns of rage to

The blatant clowns  

I realized that I was

Just a bloomed flower

Of the barren coppice

Where every blossoms wither

My erected buds

Refused to prone

And I struggle to cover it

With my both arms crossed

Poisoned arrows pierced my heart

That bleeds like a river 

Drained as a bloodless corpse

Faith was cruel like a heartless hunter

That left my soul undead in me

For I will be hurled by the stones of

Sympathetic pitying pathetic faces

That would ache as if

The unhealed bruises get hurt

Turning it in to an infection worsened

I grow mature from adolescent to women

Women to a crone

Bearing the invisible disorders  

Dragging my broken self like

A memorial of devilishness

Life and faith is as brutal as

The hungry predators

Libidinous and obscenic

The vultures will haunt me

Even when I am lifeless

But then I will be free as a

White sparrow uncaged

From the sheer attire

Of seductive trunk

Flying high in the freshness of

Boundless freedom and peace... 

The Trio

I was in love with them

Even before I knew I was a girl

Right then when I was a kid to adolescent

And now when I am a complete woman

I watch over them and

Enjoyed their pranks   

They made me laugh and cry

Many times from then to now

One being at each side.

While one push me to fall

One holds me firm

Fighting the chance to let it not hurt

My feathery fragile heart

That’s as light as lather of a soap

One or the other held me high

And tile me from the darkest time

I grew fonder and familiar

With their actions that kept me clear

That I can forever fall

Freely from any heights

And there they will lay a bed

Made out of care

Most safest and softest

Protecting me from thrashing

On the hardness of the earth.

I carry in my heart

The warmth of my love to them

Never shrink but always nurtured

Which will, one day drop the seeds

And flourish the barren fields.

They are my two eyes and two sides

Left and right as strong as

A protective wall

That had always shielded

Every aggressive dilution

To reach me, harm me

How will I ever convey

How much am I grateful,

For the greatness that you offered

And pampered me always like

A snuggling new born pup

This is for you, you both

Two quarters of my life

My own reflections

Intersections of my faith

Two imperative portions of me

Just as my breath and blood

I owe you two for life

And I wish we be together

Lives after lives, this very way

As a tremendous trio

Love you so much…

Unrealistic..!!

Is it real?

The fresh wind, the brids cry

The clocks tick and the zooming lights

Is it real? Am I real

Or just a fairy in an

Unread book

Am I just the words?

Those unroll and free

From some artistic mind

Or am I just a splatter of paint

That a painter briskly splash on the canvas

Is it real? Am I real

Its magical that I can touch him

And I watch his eyes drop in to sleep

I  saw the moon white in dark sky

Roving from one side to other side

The owl cries its song in obsession

I wonder, oh how much I am blessed

That my love is here in me

Encased, his face by my arms

Exhaling the warmth of
Unconditional affection

At the centre of my heart

I could never obsess

I never was given the chance to long

But is it real? Am I real?

Life is just steady

Cold mornings and warm evenings

Freezing nights just in there

For a lovely time to share

My imperfect wholeness

Curves and cuts misplaced

But somehow my heart

Was in place

It thumps arrhythmic

At his palest shadow

Never knowing whether

His approach is really here

But again, is it real?

Many a times I wonder

Is this all just illusion

Am I seeing the unreal?

Or am I just dreaming

Where do I belong?

Earth, Mars or Moon

Questions are many

And answers are rare

How will I break this

Hallucination unreal

Push me tap me pat me

And wake me up from this

Tricky acrobatic mirage

Consciously unconscious

And unconsciously conscious

I feel that this is not real

Still... can it be real…?

Life as it is NOW.. ;-)

I dont know how and where my lifes going or taking me to. Its fast sometimes, its rushing like a thunderbolt but hadn't crash land anywhere yet. but i have someone to stop me when my speed exceeds the limits. all i know is lifes short and days will fade and it will torn apart like an old jeans. i am loving the climate my home as always and i am getting addicted to keep me happy. i don't know how this virus infected me but this is as cool as this winter. I advise people sometime,telling them lifes long you have to sort things out now or you are gonna suffer for that long length of time. other times i would tell them to be positive and pleasant for the live is as short as your eyes blink. am i lying or am i speaking the fact..? i am confused. but finally i know one thing that i am just trying to make my surroundings happy like a morning glory in the morning or a sunflower in the sunlight. I may be wrong cause i am doing this for me. but some others says this is the right thing to do. be around people, try to wipe their tears and blast some blunders for they smile and you are paid.

When i look back, i realize, life had always been reasonable to me, sometimes great too. And what i have now is all the results of my pasts deeds. I dont know how far this wheel will run this way but now i know when it breaks i need to immediately rush to the puncture shop and patch it. I feel euphoric. I have some struggles but its just a few sharp stones on the road that i commute. that cant stop me from chasing the golden butterfly. short or long, life is life and we gotta love it the way it do to us. if it hurts you somewhere, go to the doctor, if hurls stones at you, be an elastic blanket that will bounce it back. Be positive, love is the only one remedy that works for everything in a same way. It can heal, it can repair and it can permanently cure you from anything. Wear it on your face as a lovely smile, do stupid things and keep sorrows away. It will follow you, it will find you. but never let it catch you.

Things that are not ours would never stay. because thats not ours, it has its master waiting for it and that will go some day even though it can prolong the departure for some fraction of seconds if you try to hold it back. but understand. if its gone one day then realize yours is on the way and will be yours one day. don't waste your time pursuing something thats not yours, its a sin.

Have quality time with family friends and strangers. You will learn something from it. No time is ever wasted this way. You will eventually earn. Cook for your friends and neighbours. throw some parties even though you are running out of currencies. You give you get. May be not immediately but sometime when you need it very badly and you see no ways to find it, it will reach you. Don't save, don't lavish, spent wise. If you are meant to become a multi-billionaire, life will somehow take you to there, where you get the hitch to pull the rope to climb up. Money is the only thing that time-travels. It comes from ones hand and goes back to the old hand some other day, this process will never stop, at-least until the whole worlds governance stops this money-hanky-panky.

i say lies, i behave idiotic, i travel nomadic, i eat unhealthy, i sleep orderless, i laze around, i waste time, which means i literally give time to myself and above all i lead a completely out of routine life.

having said the same..

My lifes good. Now and i will try to take it this way forever, atleast until my last day on the phase of Earth ;-
)

Jewel of Ice..

The white ignite

Like a flake of snow

The tiny jewel of ice

Blown in the flow

Of the light breeze at night

Flickered like the white

Dust of silver

Shallow and mellow

That would melt in a click

The souls that had no homes

Circled in the air for some

Billion million years

Waiting for a companion

Of another flake of white

Glow so bright

Every single eye tend

To attend to its dance

Like ballet on the tip

Of just a single toe

We crossed our paths

In between the twirls

Flaring the filigree of the

Silky satin bell-like dress

that bouncing fiercely

We fixed unknowingly

In our eyes and conjoined

Saying fairys of some

Unremembering times

The weakest in the round

Melt in the course

But the dance of the merry

Simply went on

Filling the spaces of spirits that are gone

And then it was only four

Making it a square

With corners that joined

The hands of our own

Creating a solid hard

Cube of freeze

Something looked liked

A crystal supernatural

That hardens like a milky rock

Sparkler called friendship

Bodies apart but the soul reside

Inside that crystal shall  

Always shine bright to ply

This will forever linger

And the world would once

Call this a remnant

Of the sisterly-hood

Of some un-melting flakes of snow

That found its bits on a December night

To make a mark in the history

Like the gem of Koh-i-noor

Together we fly like the

Fairies from the tales

From flowers to flower

Enjoying the taste of every drop

Like the spring just born

And the sun shines bright

We laughed in high

Until our soul were completely delighted

Far we go one by one

But always we hold

The thread of adore

Invisible but indispensable

Always till we are turned

Back in to those tiny flickers

Fall from high in some December night

Like the tiny jewel of white bright ice…

Our Destiny..!!

Just as new as a white bright day

We woke up stretching out in to each other’s eyes

A roll of dreams unroll down

And disappeared in to the darkened maze

We packed our cloths and tends and food

And set out on to the long stretch route

Through the stench and fragrances

And the dirt and thorns

We passed our journey

To find our destiny hidden behind
A lining transparent but unclear..

We collide on people of

White and dark

They yelled plead and do so many deeds

Frightened were we
To their strange feat that

Made us scared and unsafe

And all we were doing was trying hard
To flee away from the Crooked eyes
That watched every of our

Moves and turns

We passed the mountains, the hills and valleys

We saw the autumn fall and spring

Shades of yellow red and orange

Like the bright horizon on a very winter dusk

The lemon blossoms spread

The bewitching aroma

That makes the time still

As if someone stopped clock of

Rushing life we live…

Flower shops grocery stores

Fruit markets and then the meat stores

Where men shamelessly sold

Their own meat that bleed to stink

We closed our eyes with frightened awe

And ran away before they butcher us

We get sweat and thirsty in the

Vast and wide unending deserts

We suffered the bone-crashing chill
That, made us shiver like a

Hot volcano before it explode

Destiny is here, there but nowhere

Our eyes searched every creeks and peaks

Until the long run made us reach

The point where we hold our hands

To begin the run to find
What they call, the purpose of life

Of being here in this paradise

Of love laughter and life

Of greed grief and guile

All we could find is

Our both hands tied to each of one another’s

And our fingers tangled

To make us aware

That’s this is it

What we were seeking

Our destiny is we and nothing else

But together we have

To fulfill the dreams

And solve the puzzles and math of

Every stage that we overtake

Once again and all over

Every day to wake up and find

We both stare each other

Searching for the untold words

That would remain every lasting

From the eyes to the hearts

Passing to and from, time to time

This is it, oh our destiny is

That we were seeking in the creeks and peaks…

Walk in to me..!!

Out from the blue

The darkened greys

I found a speckle of ray  of light,
The aura that Grew,
The one around You,
Like a morning sun,

So bright and white

That made me blind

From the middle of the rush

I could pick you out,

Just you undoubtedly

Never giving a way

To welcome a bay.

I grew fonder to you

Your astounding grace

My dream kept traveling

To find a day to finally end up with you

Your glory glows my time

And I vanished in to some

Mysterious valley of mine

Where I build a hut of

Love and passion so strong

As strong as the scent of

A blooming marigold

My eyes fluttered

And the tears that I treasured

To shed in the pleasure

Of holding you tight

In the gap of my arms

To hold you in gluttony

Like a hungry fat gorger

The love flushed in

Like a ravishing wave

That can gulp in every

Single thing in the way

Lumps of lust splashed In me,
Like a wavering blue lagoon

Where a hundred boat would loom

Come out, walk in,

Walk in to me, where

You are invited to hide

From the vigor’s of insanity

And the viciousness of inhumanity

I will keep you safe

Secure from the sharp claws

And the thirsty dripping fangs

Come out, walk in

Walk in to me,
Where I have planted
The violets of Lavenders
And the pinks of Jacarandas,
Floral paved paths

Just for you to walk upon

To the haven of love

To the world of our own

That I build with worship

For us to live

As long as we are allowed to

Dwell forever in belongingness

You for me and me for you…

My Hummingbird

Hum hum it flew to my life

On a sudden crisp dawn

Singing the play of a sweet violin's music

That literally took me to somewhere

Where I have never gone before

It made my foot drum on the plank

Of the wooden laid verandah of mine

Teaming it like a light sweet melody

That would even melt a rock unbreakable...

It followed me to the widest wilderness

That had grown dark untouched for ages

The sound sweet it had

Plant seeds of humor and delight

In the shades of the meadow

That, looked like an overgrown beard

Of a weird-looking gipsy...

Tweek tweek I listened

It called me to attend

And every single morning I tend

To wait for its humming calls,

It made my days bright

It changed my life tame

And I find my passion back from the time

All because of this little

Cute, puffy and

Mushy perfect fledgling...

Glad days stayed long,

And we made each other all known

I made a nest in my hat

That it never had to set apart

Till one day I missed its sweet tweet

I rushed to my door like a whirlwind

And all I found was my humming bird dead...

Frozen and stiff its soft wings I found

And a dew of a tear was formed on the side

Of the half closed circle of its tiny little eye

I raised it up in to the palm of my hand

Even in the end it had
Tried to make me tender
With that cherry blossom 

At the tip of its tiny beak

Red and dark like a spill of blood

It smothered my heart

Like a restless tremor

The hum hum hummingbird

That painted my life

With all the colors a rainbow can consign 

Had fluttered afar to some unseen haven

Without a tweet of good-bye to please
Pushing me aback to the cleared up wilds
and here i am standing, all alone again..

Christmas memories..!!

Breezy windy snowy nights

Itsy-bitsy surprises we like

Sky as clear as blue velvet

And we counted the stars

That never ended

Eyes wide open

Searching in the naked

Of the sky where the stars

Kept delivering

A million baby orbs

In the gap of every blink

Tree of pine is set ornate

With all the lovely decorative

The shiny globs and glittery stars

Bells baubles and candy canes

Christmas gloves and socks in red

Snowflakes of white and

Ribbons of green

And numerous candles illuminate

Cakes cookies and wines to dine

And the mansion of ginger bread to munch

The wind brings the Karol songs

From the far villages away in the valley

While me and you awaited for

The big joyous Kris Kringle

Ride on the long reindeer sleigh

With a bundle of presents

And a loud laugh sounds

ho ho ho ho hoo…

The Seek

My feet went numb

On the frozen love

I searched it here

There and everywhere

My lips trembled in the cold

Seeking a warm kiss

Freeing the freeze

Like an hot vapour steam

I shake in disappointment

To have the crystal

Under my shoes where

It craved to get melt

I roared like a lioness

To the wide hidden chills

Which, started to harden my toe till the head

I failed to recognize

That I am all covered in

What I seek for so long miserably within

All I had to do

Was to set a flame

And it will be revealed

From the hard skin concealed..

Greed..!!

We live in greed
In the greed to have everything more
Everything more but not the grief not the misery
We wanna live long, and never wanna die
Before we even know what after life is gonna show
What life after is gonna show?
Painful or relief, we dont know what and
We cant predict, but all we know
Is only this that
We wanna live long
And the greed for a day more,
Will follow us up till the grave
And we are finally no more.. 

Gem of my tum

Chimes of my hub sings

The song of the world buried

In the hollow of the underneath

Boundless spaces of me

A tickle sometimes a prick

Made my spine shiver

In the ecstasy of some

Mysterious glee

A spun of soft wool

Or it can be the softest sponge

That absorbed my vibrancy

But never that ill smile

That was a lovely one

A parasite that fed on me

Like the heat of the sun

That sucks in all the strength

But you never blame

For you are not alive without it

I witnessed the spring, the autumn and winter

Carrying the treasure that born in my tum

But not so long that I

Was blessed to Have
The treasure for myself

To rejoice forever

The demons of filth

Find their way to me

And the glittering gem

Was snatched away from me

I followed them running

To clutch it back

But my foot were tearing 

with the thorns of ferocity

They paved on the way

To cease my seek

I fall down to sit on the

Sharps that bleed me

To watch the black cloaked

Pass away far away

With my glittering gem

That made a few of my Days..!!

Deeds of Lust

Where do you want to travel?
Ans: to the lush green hill stations & forests
Where do you want to live?
Ans: Not in the cities, somewhere calm and quite on the banks of some river.
What kind of artefacts do you like, metal or wooden?
Ans: definitely wooden. no question at all.
What is your favourite food?
Ans: anything healthy and organic
What is your wish for a good living?
Ans: Be Chemical free

I simply asked a few questions to some people close to me. They all answered vaguely but for few questions they all had similar answers and thats stated above. The surprising fact is this that, most from the modern generation is fed up with modernity and they all crave for things that they had forsaken before. A few of them and swimming in the junk of what all thrown in the trash a few years or decades back.

Human has always been doubtlessly the most selfish and self centred living thing in the world. the discipline of the life has been manipulated by human a long back which made other billions of organisms on the world miserable. It was not meant to be like this, how it is at present. The death play started when the human demolish the wild homes from the infinite number of species killing them and leaving the rest alive homeless. Now the play has reached to this extend that the human kills or troubles another human for their lust of power and wealth. They have been wrong and never tried to correct it and the result!! the earths out of mercy.

People want to travel to greeny places to have their minds calm and wish to live in calmer places, escaping from the roars of the beast called a city. people seemed to turned back to yoga, organic and non chemical things while a group still works day and night to tempt the recovering minds to go back to the evil of robotism. We studies that an axis is an imaginary line that extends from north pole to south pole. It was an imaginary line but now it is MONEY..the earth is spinning on the real axis of MONEY. People are slaved and craved by and for this piece of nothing. No i am wrong. its not nothing its everything for the notes are made from trees. In this revolution of MONEY is everything era, billions and millions of trees has been killed to woods. It has been mercilessly killed and then used for useless deeds. made into different coloured notes in different places, made in to books and news papers, furnishings and buildings. the uses are many, but there was a law to be followed. Men always succeeded in inventing from the time of the start of human on earth. But ancient men was so compatible to the nature and they lived with nature in harmony. they spoke the unspoken language to other animals, trees, mountains and stones. they seek agreement from whatever they used before killing it. They had this ability to see through things and know the age. they only cut the cut-able trees. the tress which were willing to die. They killed the animals only to fed themselves and their families which was a part of the echo system and there was no wrong. it is wrong now cause the killing and slaughtering has been developed in to business, for self motivation. improper farming in which animals are chemical fed and grown unhealthily for the sake of money. they are forcefully denied a normal life and grown just for the profit to culminate their bank account. they are fed heavy hormones and proteins, caged immovable from birth to death in the darkness of pain. And the ones who have it divides the sin.

People wants to furnish their house with wood, lots of wood, lots and lots of wood, here, there and every where. But how come they get the wood when they keep cutting the trees and never plants again? the earth is getting balder and balder every day. soon the only living thing on the earth would turn to just human. but we are unaware or pretending to be blind about one thing that to exist alone on this plant is impossible. even a tiny worm in this planet is doing its part to keep the system go well. Its only the human leads the self sophisticated life ruining the cycle and destroying the common property. Mans monopoly will end soon. The world is not that small to be monopolized. It will react, it will show its power and then its just a ball of fire and flood and rumbles. Man has shrunken in to the size of a single grain of his own brain. The ability to think vast and sense wide is long lost by the man. this is a home of everything in it and man is just another species like others. everything is not under our control. Killing, abandoning and contaminating the lives of other animals is the worst that anyone can do to their room-mates.

The earth is so gracious that it has room for everything takes birth in its lap. We have a portion of our own then why looting others part? Let them all live as they wish. Let them have their freedom. Let the Lion rule the wild. Life is all that every living thing treasures the most. Let just have the Life and leave the rest, like to own an acre of land in the river side, and you spoil the entire life inside the river just for the sake of a few lifes that accompany you. Buy some acres land in the wild and live an adventurous life and abandon the life in there by cutting out the tress and destroying the hills and mountains thus creating ecological hazards. If a 1000 human thinks this way, imagine how much the earth can be ruined by fulfilling our filthy fancies? Just lets breath, if someone asks you this question, what do you have in life? answer them, i am breathing. even though its polluted. Thats enough for a living, thats the very basic need but none realises. We are thought that the basic need of a human is food shelterer and clothing. Do you think that's really is the basic needs of a human? No. exactly not. The basic need is not shelter, which the nature itself holds the best options, food? the nature itself is providing that and would continue to provide it in the same quantity and quality if we don't upset the cycle. and clothing..?? who wants a cloth while we are already clothed in the finest leather and fur the nature could ever offer. Its all in front of us. but we are the idiotic creatures god had ever invented. No crops are man-made no pulses are man made, it was so long in this world before we discovered it. In the name of cultivation and shelter, we had destroyed three fourth of it from the sight of the world, we only have 27% of forest of total land area. Imagine how the earth was from the beginning of time, majority was forests and some trash land plus a small portion of desert. How much we have become termites and ate all the wood? what do you do if this happened in your own house, these creatures eating your brand new furniture. You would kill it. So what do you expect in return for this act of ours, carving the roof of this luxurious adobe? Yes.!! we are all gonna get killed. Even if not swept away at a time, we are all gonna end up getting mercilessly killed from this wealth-lusty life soon.  The selfish craves, the hunger for gains should be stopped and learn to expand our minds to accommodate every living beings would only simplify life. This run behind wealth, fame and power would make you exhausted and mad, one day we are all gonna go under the soil.

Killing for food is natural. But killing for play is rude. This will once return to yourself in some other ways. Beware, every tiny organisms have a thing called soul and we should respect it. I feel sad that i am alive in this era, in which the cattle's are force-pumped from their udders every day. The machine never knows if its sucking out the milk or the blood. I ate fatty chickens, injected by hormones and i resembles the human form of them right now. IF i wish to go vegetarian, i will have to consume poisonous chemicals along with that, which is gonna effect my offspring's, my following generations too. Grains, cereals, fruits, vegetables and even the water every single thing is contaminated. Profit, money, wealth. its all the side-effects of the wealth-lust carried by a few among us. This way they are poisoning even their own children. Man discovered medicines to keep ourselves live long. The same man toxifies the food that we all eat. What does this mean? May be people dont die as before and the earth is getting heavier with undead souls, expired but still sold. So inorder to give space for new lives the system created life-threatening ailments like cancers, aids, cardiac disease and infections. 7 in ten people in the world are diabetic not by their fault. By the human monsters who feed artificial stuffs they calls, instant food, frozen food and convenience food. We eat it and get diseased. High cholesterol, high sugar, high pressure which in some years takes you to Hyper- so and so and media happily nick names it "LIFE STYLE DISEASES". yes the problem is with the life style. Every thing is in handy, all you need to do is to warm it in a micro wave oven. Puff..!! breakfast is ready or lunch is ready or  dinner is ready in 5 minutes. No peeling, no cutting, no heating, no burning and no smoking. We are all forced to enjoy Ease. everything is available ready-made in the shelves of a "SUPER" market then why dirtying the hands..? the blame is not completely to the production companies. a small percentage goes to those who welcome their ideas. we are all getting ourselves trapped in the name of time-saving. what are we saving time for? Nothing. gossiping. back-stabbing, or putting ourselves in stress to compete one another. He buys a bike, you buys a motor-bike, he buys a car, you buys a convertible, he buys a boat, you buys a yatch and this competition goes until death. Some youngsters says whats life with out all accessories? They dont realize the truth that, today a hand-held universe inside the palm is ruling them. There are million billion things that we have to observe and feel lucky to live in the store of nature. A brother hits a sister for not able to hold the mobile phone and falls down. People become crazy for robots? He hits his sister and she gets hurt both physically and mentally, i dont think that rectangular slab had expressed an ouch!! on falling on the floor.  Its just a phone, you lost or break one, you get another in a mobile store. But this is not the same with human. You lost a sister and you dont get one in any stores in the whole universe. Come on people wake up, get rid of this addiction towards meaning less, value-less machinery's. The most complex, fully loaded, automatic, energy saving, fast working, all rounder is only US. There is nothing invented or discovered better than a Human itself.

While we spent money on appliances to wash cloths, dishes, clean house, store food, entertain and be cool, we are burning the womb like protection of this earth called Ozone. What does it even mean to have this all and get some other effects from other sides. Its true, we are our own problems. We lit the fire and cut the ribbon to our own sorrows. the world had rushed so ahead and none can imagine a life without all these man-made aids. We are weak not physically but are enslaved by the momentary luxuries. We forgive the kid for the first hurl of stone on our head, we may forgive for the second time but not any more. This is what our mother earth is doing now. she feared us with small earth quarks, land fall and flood. Everyone survived . She repeated it twice thrice and more than that now time has come that she cant hold that vulnerability anymore, she started acting, first in the name of Tsunami, then hurricanes and cyclones, volcanoes and heavy land drifts. And a numerous are dying in plain crushes, road accidents, flues and viruses. Take a list of natural disasters in the past five years and see how many had disappeared from the phase of the earth so far. It continues to happen. and all we can do is to weep and push life until our time comes in the grief of our dear people. Our parents, family, relatives and friends vanishing forever, imagine the situation. We are approaching the darker era and no inventions can help us escape from it. This rage of the nature is unstoppable unless we take a pledge to preserve the remaining of her and help her with a hair fix or surgery. Stop mining, stop destroying forests, stop chemicalizing and stop contaminating the only two needs of our life water and air.

Human and trees must go hand in hand, it should be in a ratio of at-least one tree for one man. We all knows the cycle, trees exhales, human breaths, human exhales trees breath. It is a must that we conserve it or imagine going breath-less, being in a room full of other gases or simply carbon dioxide. Can you bear it for at least more than a minute? Nope! Impossible. And why are we killing them? are they trying to do the same to us? No! its we who are the destructors. we are gonna sued, in the court of lord, the almighty.

we are clearing our paths to hell. Imagine about a time when no tress left and we struggle to breath, imagine what happen when someone tight your neck hard and you go breathless, you dont feel normal atleast for an instance, you struggle to get freed from the lock, you shake your legs and your eyes bulge out. How will we survive in the earth with out air then? preserving trees are more important than building a house with concrete for the shade of it is the safest home for anything in the world. what can give the cooling that a forest can offer us? we creates something that hurts something else. there is nothing that man had ever invented that don't bite back. we are the harm, we are the cancer to ourselves that can never be cured. the so called intellect is the problem or cause of every negativities on the earth.

Lets stop this. or we will be stopped by the nature itself and it ends up washing away every traces of manhood from the phase of the earth..!!

Simplest Fancies..!!

The most wonderful things in life cant be seen or sometimes touched, it should always be felt. So its simple..its the feelings and emotions that keep everyone of us going in life. Our fellows not only invented all these technological master-pieces but also the fast and hurried flow of life. A life-style that only takes but never gives. I encountered a few people in the slow walks that i take, and could get surprise that many of them don't even realize that they breath. Life is "just". The run must cease one day. And nothing is permanent.

I am thankful to god that some of my deeds in the past made me my this slow, calm and peaceful life deserving to me. I might either have got free from a curse or i am blessed with a boon. Neither way is ok for me cause i am absorbing every single atom of the sweetness of the delectable fruit called LIFE. I realize this is the best that it can offer and the best i can ever have. And so i don't want to miss any single simple fancies that i hold in my heart, that i started weaving like a fine silk yarn from the age my fantasies begin to sprout.

A swim in the deep sea, a lost day in mediation, a few time in a day to laugh out till your stomach ache, cherishing school days with a best friend or any other long gone friends time, a family talk with your parents and sibling; making fun of each other for how you fight, surprise and love, a night naked on the terrace watching the stars blink-less, to share a warm bath with your partner, to have a lazy afternoon sex, to re-read a favorite book, to transfer a mental-portray to the canvas after a long time, to talk with your plants, to spent sleep less- long talk night with a sister, record the first smile, first step and first word of your child, to go on a long ride on a smooth road with a nice play on, to watch the super sunset and share a kiss..

All this, wont never raise the sum in your bank account but this will present that so-called-heaven right down in the earth. Your partner, parents or children would never appreciate you for the life-less things that you present them but they will always remember and leave a smile for the few moments you share with them. It was never money, it never was wealth, it was those humanly time that you spare, a tiny part of your life that you spent worth it all than anything ever discovered or invented.

Life is full of surprises, don't get that much in to your own business that you pass it unnoticed..!! 

Love Through Times

The days went like a

Fast flip notebook

Where I forget to note

The treasures of the sail

Kept it somewhere safe

Like the jewel I can never forsake

Wonder if we both are

Traveling the time

That we reached this far

In just a day’s long ride

You made me cheer

With the winks that could tear

My heart, just a mellow

That can’t bear its fire

The touch of your fingers

Made my passion thrive

Up until I reach every extremity’s extreme

Your one tight hug

Could soothe my soul

Even from the incurable

Pains that I hold

That tender skin of your lips

When caresses mine

Some long lost rhythm

Unfolds like a rose

Frozen in a shell for

A long time uncouth

Love is this that all you give

And all I have to give you back

Our pages may flip, quick

Again in a snap  

And I will keep a Snip

Of this delicate treat

That would always whip

The softness of my crème

I may loss my sight

You may get more whites

But my entire mind would

Even then watch is the

Winks of your eyes

The mirror of your soul

That carried my sign

Always and forever...

Seven

Seven are the colors

That’s paint my life

Seven are the hills that

I bound to climb

Seven are the notes of the music

That my soul play

And seventh is the haven

Where I ought to reach on my final day...

Selfless Possessions

From the weirdest wilds

I wake up with thirst

Breaking the all invisible

Knots, that binds me from

My inner to outer

I unwind my ‘self ‘

My selfless possessions

That I carried through 
And saved just for you...

November Night..!!

The days so bright and white

The sky is a fluffy bunny of clouds 

The chill blew my face frozen and pale

Taking every single red of my cheek to fade

They flare the wings wide, the birds so high

And the sight would just make me blaze my fire

The nights are blue and the stars shimmer

I help myself with a cup of  enriched Joy

Cross-legged and longed for a broken star

To rain the gleaming dust of Love

My eyes wide, my heart pound

As the wind caressed my undisclosed fancies

That are now broke out from the

So long locked and suppressed chagrin

No fragrance of jasmine soothed me

No splash of the rain smoothed me

I was still an unbloomed bud

That had all that nectar yet to fed

Sweet and sugary, the drink of the gods

Are still enclosed under the feather of my heart

Come and explore, I shout out loud

But the dumb world seemed gone deaf all around

The November night as

Always slime

Wearing the shattered silvers that chime 

I wonder how I ponder it always

Since I was grown to know its charm

Has always kept this marvel unleash

Love was in the air

Of the perpetual November

Strong and deep

Like the flavor of a melted

Dark chocolate that linger your tongue eternally 

Don’t leave, don’t go

Don’t rush, don’t retreat

Coz you have all of me to restrain

For your selfish needs to be gifted

And your selfless manners to be praised

Stay the way you have always been

Don’t let my heart get crushed in pain

And long for you to arrive again

After a ride of hundreds more miserable days..!!

Ruled by the Means..!!

The play of gain and loss is fury

We‘ve seen it from the start to the bury

The eras at the point of just burglary 

That a mother gets the rent

For where you were buried

And how you are nurtured

In her walls till surgery.

Funny is this, that you escape the route

As soon as your claws set firm on the floor

Taking pleasure in a whole and then rob the lot

Sinner is who not her not you

It’s the world that churns no more on the axis

But only on the means… :)

Back to the Start..!!

Still and motionless was

I in the desert

Sands under my foot

Grow up to shape a frame

Frame of human all around

Like the grains of sand infinite

They roar and shift

From place to place

As if a current is pushing

Them from phase to phase

My eyes wander for a

Known face in the rush

Of the unknown chase

The storm of the sand whirled a high

Brought down my vision to dry

Abstained the souls to

Their own holes

Leaving aback my

Cries ever so untold

My biased fury broke out

To the seamless space

Where the stars of my dreams

Used to glitter like a beryl

Yellow and silver

Glimmer and flicker

Till my eyes were eclipsed
By the sheath of the desertion 

Unrecognized by my fellows

Who, always kept me lively

Here I go wandering

All alone again in the

Search of the soul that
reside In me, undiscovered...

The Golden Unicorn (our ponnu)

It was like a tradition followed in my family to call every subfamilies youngest ones "Ponnu" , In which my brother and my dads elder brothers youngest daughter were the most known "ponnus" who had born hand in hand with just a gap of a couple of weeks.

My dad and his elder brother "pratheesh" who looked alike, behaved alike were the most closest too..and as an unrolled ribbon the connections in between the family were so tight from the father to father, mother to mother, eldest son to eldest son, middle child to middle child (me and jee) and finally ponnu to ponnu. we grew up together fight playing caring and loving until one day the connection just hung on father to father only. we found it late about someone trespass our minds dirtying  with poison of loathe. but by the time this happen we lost one precious gem from our minds crown.

We all grew up together sharing unbreakable friendship and sibling-hood. While both Ponnu's grew up building an invisible link just like twin born. Me and jee at the same time were even called twins for having being resembling alike somewhere. time passed and one day the girl ponnu started to feel unease finding her sister getting closer more to me than her. her sore mind was known to us but we took it as a childs things. it reached to that extend that she even told me on my face that i am stealing her sister. Life went on as planned by the almighty and it favoured her, that the plan took me far away from her loving sister and it was then only they both. God gave more reasons to be worried about and i hardly realize that this happened.

When i get back to my native after years, all i found was a beautiful women formed from an introvert, down, annoyed, irritated girl. She had that all grace which could blaze any lovers heart on fire. Boys run mad behind her. she dumped a few and a very few dumped her, she was miserably racing to find the perfection of the prince-charming in her dreams..but never found anyone covering the completion. There was none to make her know that no one takes birth as a complete person, its their lives experiences and the situations they lived makes them or mould them. Every human possess that ability to bend in to any shape but it always require a powerful sculpturers hand. When someone loves someone deeply, each of the lovers gain a hold in each others mind, body and soul.. they becomes an instrument of affection and care that they works on the partners way when winded correctly. Love is ultimately not finding a perfect person but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly. she failed to realize this fact and tried forsaking her whole to fed her  fantasy.

after my marriage, a sand wind cracked the two families and literally we all broke up except the fathers. we never spoke to each other, we never met each other, infact we ran away from each other, somewhere we tried not to collide at the centre of the crossroads..but all i knew from then to now is that for a very long time i continuously dreamed of jee and patching up with them..i dreamed of the two sisters, the two i ever considered as my elder one and my younger one..i could never imagine this that we are out from two different wombs. finally after a very long time, being the food of another disaster made me forget them and carry on with what life gives me day to day or time to time. My life gave a big price to help me escape from the dreams that made me weep every single morning. The abortion..!!

Ponnu matured on top of her skin to be a bold, outspoken, strong, eligible women. she was the only girl born in that family who had that courage to sleep alone in our old house which had been now taken over by their father. her fantasy can be seen solid in her room.. it was decorated with a violin on the wall, a big teddy bear and a handful of soft toys on her dressing table an oval mirror, a pinky bedside foot mat and a white cloud like filigree bed net cascading from the roof till the floor making it look imperial..it looks like a perfectly ordered princess room..curtains and wardrobes and a big line of footwear's..what didn't she had? i question me. i have always seen her to be a perfect piece of gods art..

apart from other times of my life after marriage, these days i kept myself busy with the works i had. My self respect grew high watching myself skipping my food and TV shows . i was back to that state of excellence.  dedication, Corresponding, talking, writing, thinking, calculating and so on. I was temporarily unavailable for my friends and family, i was busy planting the seeds to grow up and fruit money. It was then i got one of my sisters call, whom i wanted to call and check about herself and her long-waited baby. I gladly picked up the receiver and squeezed it in between my left shoulder and cheek so that i can free my hands to work on my laptop. She sounded cheerless and then she shocked me with this. saying "ponnu is gone. she committed suicide."

for a moment i was a cut out from every systems that kept me alive. my breath held, heart stopped and the receiver fell down..my hands shivered like a arthritic patient. My mind went back hundreds of days back..rushing like i am falling from the sky. weightless and powerless..wind blowing my skin a back..pictures of different occasions flipped through, i heard laughters and fights and yells. I couldn't believe that the moment was real, or what i heard was true. i bend down and picked the phone to hear her utter my name in distress. i couldnt say a word but mumbled something and then i realized that i am screaming..

as every time, i tried convincing my mind saying, i didn't get any call, it was a dream and nothing happened. everything was the same as before. i kept lying to myself in disbelief. My mobile ringed, and after more than 1 and a half years, i find this name appeared on the screen "Jean Blr". we broke up for no reason but we patched up paying a fortune. that wasn't necessary. it got our ponnus lifes value.. i didn't want it giving her whole self. for some reasons, i was not surprised to see her calling me. i picked up and my concious mind returned to screeching, yelling and shouting and crying and weeping. how would i console her? what will i tell her? "its ok?"..i listened to her and she listened to mine. both f our minds wandered with a WHY?

On hearing this news, he was out of his office to home. he knows the depth of me emotionally, mentally and physically. i become just a translucent  layer of something through the years and i cant hide anything within me..no room for hidden files..i felt so blessed to have him and sorry to him for threatening him of dying for silly matters and promised him, i will never ever say that word again. i can imagine how much that might have hurt him to hear it in my voice..when i now know how much i feel lost and wounded to have this news of my little sister passing away. i kept searching every corners of my memory for what could be the reason for her to forsake her life, i failed miserably to find an answer. it was all complete when it comes to her. i always though that being her would be the most luckiest thing to happen in someone's life. she was blessed with everything a girl of her age desire about. I could make up my mind with just this, she died out of luxury. I would say only this..a loving brother..father..sister..mother.. her every wishes were always fulfilled..

I praised her courage at once and then i corrected. to live is the most difficult thing. death is as simple as swallowing a few pills. but to live is to sacrifice many things, undergo different pains, having mental and physical tensions, taking responsibility, bearing children, building a family. people go to hospitals to get cure from incurable diseases like AIDS, cancer and lot many ailments, why? they wanna live, they dont even seek a normal life, they just wanna be on the earth, alive no matter bedridden, or with external support, they just wanna take breath. many are there wishing to live for another day or month or a year. Life is short and precious. one day we all will die. we will see people vanishing from our lives. which i will say is one among the most difficulties to face in LIFE. losing the near and dears forever, we watch them smile, cry, play, love and care and one day all ceased in the air conditioned glass-box.

We are all born to die. then why dont we build that courage and be strong to face everything life presents us? Everyone does it, have done it and will continue doing it. Pushing oneself to death is just a running away from life. Its only complete, when we devour everything life has kept for us. It is the purpose of taking birth in this vast universe. To grown in the darkness of the womb, experiencing the first breath, to get breast-fed, to play, to learn,to make friends, to fall in love, to give commitments, to acquire great heights, to travel the world, to have pleasure in sex, to break up relationships, to lie at times, to devote, to marry, to become parents, to watch them grow, to raise the children, to become parent-in-laws, to become grand parents and great grand parents to spoil the children, to teach the lifes experiences, to guide them, to encounter everything that possibly comes your way, good bad, sweet sore, negative positive, sad and happy and then retire to rewind it, to cherish and prepare to go to the grave with that toothless wide smile of satisfaction. This is called a complete Life. This is for what one is on this planet. For this is why a mother press her pain down the navel to bring you into this beautiful world. her pain must not go in vein. show her yourself living in joy. Thats the one best things a child can give to their living goddess, your guardian angel on earth, The Mother..!!

After a long pensive journey, we reached there after the stars glow, its winter, and the sky is as clear as a dark azure blanket dotted with white. the moon was glowing like a round silver plate. it was all silent and my sight broke it. a sudden cry of grief echoed the whole place. a few aunts, my mother and jee were out to receive the falling me..i was placed on the chair and jee came to console me holding her breath..she hasnt changed a bit, some grains in my brain couldn't leave it unobserved. the night was passed unslept trying to find out a clue for this action of hers in our minds and then projected it to her room where things remained in the same order, how she left it. Her few things were in the custody of police, like camera, two mobile phones and her laptop. We being the sisters were asked to keep some of her cloths ready to dress her while bringing her home from the hospital. We choose her favourite purple dress, the one which she wore on my wedding and the accessories she used to ornate herself, her bangles, earrings, neck lace, bindhi and her favourite perfume. For so long, since i got married, we started planing for hers, we thought of what kinda cloths to get her for the engagement, pre-night party, the jewellery, the best make-ups and a lot many things. we even decided to cloth ourselves in our wedding dress on her great day..but..ultimately the plans are not ours..its all confirmed and sealed by the one above, moving the strings..

We watched the dawn, the sunrise, and then people started accumulating, relatives, friends, neighbours, colleagues. every visitor to her mothers room caused louder screams. which made it unbearable to control the pain thats pulsating at the centre of the chest. every eyes looked sore and swollen. her mothers tears rolled down enough to wash the whole face to neck to the narrows of her breasts that was once sucked by her last child in hunger and thirst whos no more now.

the sound of the ambulance banged my head, everyone was expecting to see her for the one last time. in the crowed there would have been, heart-broken young guys, her enemies, her friends and mates. everyone gathered nearing the hall way where her body was brought. me and jee for once refused to see her, we wanted to have that smiling, moving, lively face of her in our memory to remember her forever. But we were asked to go and see her or let her watch us bursting out our everything for losing her. Watching our baby on the floor all dressed up, still like a stone, eyes half closed and grey lips partially open was the most torturous sight we ever had n our life..she was just a flower bloomed, she had many more days to cheer but she took herself to a journey on her own, alone..i felt my whole body throbbing in disbelief, she was frozen in the mortuary for a whole day, couldn't imagine how they cut through the different parts of her mushy body. I watched her blink-less for the last time, our kiddo, shes gone and this is the last time we would ever see her, even though, she looked so different- life less. She was our pampered little doll. Her wrinkled-nose smile, which many times made me felt like shes not only smiling with her lips but her happiness glowed and flowed through her beautiful brown eyes. Her silk like hair, her jingling talk, we are gonna miss it all till the end of our lives.

For the last time, having her in front of us, made me feel like i was having a bad dream and hoped someone to interrupt me and wake me up. but the roars of grief draw me back and made me realize it is reality. Someone shouted that the corpse cant be kept for so long and they want to take her to the beach where hindu funeral activities were done. this made me feel dizzy, i tried my best to take in as much of air as i can or i will faint, my nose was blocked, my eyes were blurred, my hands raised itself to touch her for head and bless her for the last time, the blessing i kept to present her on her marriage. I placed my hand on her and it was just like cold concrete, as cold as an ice box, numb and unmovable, lifeless and solid..all i could do finally for her was to drop a kiss on her forehead, i placed a red rose on her hands shivering and trembling and kissed her skin slowly, it made the skin on my lips numb too..i looked at her for the last one time and turned to the room where we were waiting her final arrival..the cries become louder and sharp that pierced my heart from front to back.

The siren rang again, we heard the sound of the engine of the ambulance start, it was her last travel on the earth, we heard the doors shunt closed and then it moved..Saying bye to even a stranger is sometimes difficult then how can we say bye forever to someone our own? the cries reached the highest heights made the room quiver like earth quake..the yowl turned in to shouts, the shouts in to cries, the cries in to weeps and the weeps in to sobs, by then the tears were all done producing. the most difficult part is this, to watch someone cry tearless..

Life is not something to throw into the garbage. its worthy. love yourselves, live to the fullest and never die with regrets cause human brain is still not convinced about finding whats after DEATH. its a question still unanswered. No one knows what happens, and those who knows never explained..