Just to say a HELLO to my Girls!!

ahh!! here, i can smell that rustic muddy smell that of an on Library. a book fungus smell, that always used to hint me about how long i have not entered the room. I loved it even though it gave allergies to a lot around there. I can hear my voice echo in here, as if i was gone for a long holiday and come back to receive a lonely home of mine. I see how lifelessness can create this many changes to the lifeless bricks. or how much a lifeless block of bricks can be lively with the presence of Life! Our voice, our touch, our air... there something is mysterious.. i think there really is no point in being negative coz we itself are made of positivity's and we spoil us by adding the dirt in to the crystal clean spring of our soul and making it dark, the more we add negativities the more we become dark and lost..

I have been doing many things these days, and i found that it still took away my time like a cotton candy exposed in the air. Birth and Death, the commence and finale. In between is where the fun exist. the stop-watch is running, seconds after seconds in a quick walk and we wont know when the button is pressed to stop! that is mandatory and none can stop, i know all this but in between the start and the end, i want to mark my existence marked somewhere that i ll be remembered in a good way even after years of my being not alive on this blue ball. Everything is incredible. Sorrows are the chilly flakes on top of the pizzas, its hot but that's what makes it taste different and good. I know this, i know most of it but i know that i don't know everything. :)

I came here today to say a BIGH HI to my girls. Who have been with me through out the time since we met and i can feel it. We dont speak that much or chat or haven't met in many months or a year or two but i can feel your presence. I can see that i am not alone what ever damn i do. This is why i love you all. This feeling is what that made me come here today and open the door that really creaked. Its dirtied by the spider webs that out grown to look like a rusted mesh in most of the corners. and i see our old posts and photos all dusty too! i wiped it with my hand and it made my gloves look like yuck, still reading a few lines from the words behind the glass frame made me all go heart-wiggling!!! And butterflies in my tummy!! Good old Girly days! I miss that, i dont listen to enrique, i dont walk in the rain, i dont look up at the berths in the train, and i dont do a lot of things that i always loved to do, only because i....i....because i miss you terribly guys...i miss us...and i dont want to do that without you....i know i cant find time to chat with you or call you or get in touch with you but have time to write it here...i have time to write it here because i may not be able to tell all this to all of you using my tongue, that would crush me in to powder like a delicate cookie...i cannot do this talk as good as i did it here. I have always felt that this place is our heart, we are four equal pieces of IK4 and what ever i scribble here would reach you all some way...I love you...I miss you...come back some time...this used to be our park bench where we spent a lot of our evenings, this used to be our coffee shop at the corner where we used to chit-chat and limitlessly laughed...i can see it covered by dried leaves, waiting for us to clear it and have a seat again, i can hear our unclear conversation still echoes within the dark corners of the cafe. I am trying to breath-out that nausea of our nostalgia thats really hurting at the centre of my heart..!!

take care and i wish i find anyone of you waiting here the next time i steps in...